The Hilltoppers Al-Anon Family Group

Hilltoppers-AFG Home Page
Hilltoppers Home
Online Meeting
God Box
Group Conscience
Meeting Schedule
Alateen Info
Contact Info

Al-Anon Forum Magazine Featured Article

Loving Words
I was in the program for two years before I got a sponsor. During that time, I often felt guilty for not having one. In weekly meetings, I would hear others say, "My sponsor made me do this," or "My sponsor made me do that." What did I need that for? I didn't need anyone telling me what to do. I had an alcoholic doing that, already.
At one meeting I found myself listening to someone sharing his dilemma. He led the discussion and talked about why he had not yet found a sponsor. He said he didn't want someone telling him what to do and he didn't want to have to call someone every day. As I listened, I realized he was talking about me, too. As he continued sharing, he read the December 28 passage about sponsorship from Courage to Change. It contained one sentence that I will always remember: "Someone who demonstrates unconditional love and still takes care of his or her own needs and who offers support without telling me what to do can be a wonderful role model." As I listened to the passage, I closed my eyes and saw the tired, bearded face of a wonderful man who called me this week. Although a regular member of our group, he wasn't at this particrular meeting, but I felt his presence just the same. Yesterday he had called, simply leaving a thoughtful message on my answering machine. His loving words greeted me when I came home from a long day at work, saying he was thinking of me and remembering me in his prayers. As I thought about this oldtimer, I realized that over the past few weeks he had called my home on several occasions, just when I needed it the most. He never told me what to do or what to say. He simply called and left messages of "Peace" and "Have a good day," or "Keep coming to meetings." One day he even fared me a prayer.
As I continued thinking about these wonderful acts of love, I decided during the meeting that I would call him before the week ended. When I called him, I told him I had been to a meeting on sponsorship. I read him the passage from Courage to Change and told him that I didn't want anyone telling me what to do. I thanked him for what he had done and told him that I just wanted him to keep doing what he was already doing. I asked if he would be my sponsor without telling me what to do. When he laughed and then thoughtfully replied that he would be my sponsor, I realized that I never really found a sponsor. My sponsor found me.
I adopted my sponsor's method of making phone calls. Instead of waiting until I am walking through the valley of the shadow of death, I often call others when I'm feeling my best. I'11 think of someone to whom I can make a short call, just to let them know that they are in my thoughts. Sometimes I'Il leave a short message of experience, strength and hope.
Bill D. - Georgia
Alcoholism is a family disease. Those of us who live with, or have have lived with, this disease as children or adults sometimes have problems which the Al-Anon program can help us to resolve. If you have answered yes to some of all of the above questions, Al-Anon may be of help to you. You can contact Al-Anon by checking your local telephone directory, or from the Resources page. Phone numbers and Contact Information for the Austin Area are listed on the Contact Page of this website.
These articles were reproduced with permission from 'The Forum', the monthly inspirational newsletter of Al-Anon. Al-Anon World Headquarters, Inc. is located in Virginia Beach, VA. See www.Al-Anon.org for more information.